Looking for my soul mate, "Joe"

I don't put much stock into all this cosmic woo-woo stuff about love. I think there's something to be said for being positive, which is a lot of what "the law of attraction" is all about, but I have to resist from rolling my eyes when people start talking about soulmates and putting things out into the "universe." But let's face it. I've tried just about everything else, so I'm going to do what Arielle Ford suggests in her seminar on how to "manifest my soulmate." She says the first key is to have clarity in who I'm looking for. So here goes:

I want someone who has a genuine, friendly smile coupled with a mischievous, playful twinkle in his eye. We'll be able to look at each other across a room and share a secret look... a look that might say, 'I can't wait until we're alone' or maybe just say, 'I have gas. Aren't you glad you're over there?' His smile, his touch, his voice will make my heart beat faster and fill my stomach with butterflies. I'll love his words, his humor, his intelligence, and his kindness. He will most likely be a father, but even if he's not, he will love kids - being somewhat of a kid himself... loving to play and laugh, happy to join in any goofy game or activity.

My "soulmate" will laugh when I make a corny joke, hold me when I cry, and be happy to snuggle as we watch a movie or just read quietly together. He'll think I'm pretty even when I don't have makeup on and he'll find creative, personal ways to show me he loves me. He'll love it that I celebrate the anniversary of our first kiss, the summer and winter solstice, and every unusual holiday there is.

He will be handsome but humble, strong but vulnerable, confident but not arrogant. We will both be independent, keeping our hobbies and friendships... but we won't feel insecure or jealous when we're apart, because we feel sure of our mutual love for one another.

He will care about health and won't smoke or do drugs. He'll have a healthy mind and won't dwell on anger or past hurts or grief. And he won't be judgmental of others. He'll be grateful for his strengths, passions and skills, and won't act superior to others.

When we talk, we'll each listen and support one another. We'll never run out of things to say, but sometimes we'll be happy just laying quietly together.

We won't share all the same interests or passions, but it won't matter. We will find things we both enjoy -- maybe traveling or cooking (and definitely eating!). He'll be happy to teach me things and learn from me, too. He'll love to learn and when he's excited or has learned something new, he'll want to share it with me as soon as he can. He'll text or call just to tell me something trivial because he'll know that I'll love that he wanted to share it with me.

He will prefer summer to winter and love sunshine and beaches. He'll be excited to explore new places and find something fun to do whereever we go. But it won't really matter where we are... even if we're stuck in an airport with a 3-hour delay... we will have fun because we're together.

So there he is. Now I think I'm supposed to talk to this guy who's out there in the Universe somewhere... I think I'll call him... Joe... (Joe was my first boyfriend's name. And it does have a nice generic feel to it.) If any of you know Joe (oh yeah... he also has to be single and around my age) please let him know I'm looking for him.

OK, Joe. I know you're out there! Come find me before we get much older, please!