Happiness Happens: Bubbles

 

There's nothing quite so magical and romantic as bubbles!

Happiness Happens: Off the Grid with Minnesota Friends

 

Happiness Happens: The Minnesota Zoo

Today's Happiness Happens post is about the Minnesota Zoo! This is an AWESOME zoo and it's right in Apple Valley, MN where my friend, Lisa, lives.  I can't believe I lived here in 2016 and never visited this zoo before. It is so beautiful! 

Maybe it's because I'm retired now and my time is completely my own..  or maybe it's because this was just a more beautiful zoo than usual, or maybe it was because I was happy being with my friends, Steve and Lisa, but..  this was truly a Carpe Diem experience!

From the otters, to the big brown bears, to the flamingos, all the animals were so lovable. The environment looked so natural and expansive.. not like the old fashioned zoos with caged animals of my childhood.  At times I would have thought I was right out there in the wild! How wonderful to be able to see these magnificent beings!

I have not had time to edit my pictures, but I'm just going to upload them raw for your viewing pleasure!

Happiness Happens: A Hot Bath in a Welcoming Friend's Home

 

My Happiness Happens blog post this morning is about the comfort of a hot bath! But for bonus points, I'm combining it with the gratitude I feel when I visit my friend, Lisa, in  her Apple Valley, Minnesota home.

I love a hot bath at the end of the day! It's my sanctuary spot at home. It's on my list of remedies for clearing my mind from any worries and easing any physical aches and pains. 

When you're not at home, often a hot bath is not possible. Some hotel rooms only have showers and, of course, depending on your situation and the purpose of your travels, you often cannot just disappear into a long bath like some kind of prima donna.

Prima donna that I am, however, I was able to luxuriate in a heavenly bath last night, followed by a deep and sound sleep!

On top of that, I have the wonderful benefit of not only feeling warm and comforted by a bath, but by being welcomed to my friend, Lisa's, beautiful Minnesota home!

This gorgeous basement suite was my home in Minnesota with Lisa for a month in 2016.  I met her at a tennis Meetup when I had a contract in Eden Prairie at Optum and she became one of my best friends.

Another friend, Chris, hosts an annual Minnesota Island Retreat in early August, and Lisa welcomes me to stay at her home before we head out to the island with the group.  This year, Lisa broke her foot and might not even be able to go to the island (though we're still trying to figure out a way to get her there!) But despite that obstacle, she's still willing to host me here. She's such a generous friend.

Whenever I'm here, I feel such a sense of peace and happiness. I have the nostalgic memories of living here and all the fun Lisa and I had.  

Mostly, I just feel so welcomed and loved by all my Minnesota friends, but especially by my BFF, Lisa!

Happiness Happens: Grateful for RTD and SkyRide!

 

Yay! I'm heading out to Minnesota for an annual reunion with a group of friends I met in 2016. 

It will be a little tough to keep up my daily Happiness Happens blog post, but I'm sneaking this one in as I'm sitting at DIA waiting to board my flight.

There's so much about travel that I take for granted or even complain about.  However, over the years, especially as I became a very frequent traveler while I was a consultant, I came to recognize how wonderful the SkyRide RTD Bus Service is! It's one of the things I now look forward to when I fly out of DIA!

The Flatirons Crossing Park'n'Ride is only a mile from my house and the busses to DIA run every hour. The busses are comfortable and so much more convenient and economical than driving and parking at the airport.  They drop off right at the DIA entrance by security.  When I don't have to check a bag, I just zip right through security (I always get to go through the Pre-TSA line) and I get to my gate lickety-split!

I've even met some nice people on my frequent bus travel! I became Facebook friends with my bus driver when I was going to Omaha every week and I met another new friend who I went hiking with.

It's so convenient to be able to enjoy the ride instead of stressing out about traffic or weather or missing my exit or dealing with airport parking..

YAY for RTD and SkyRide and all the people who make getting around this beautiful world possible!

Happiness Happens: Podcasts

 

This month is Happiness Happens Month and I'm blogging about things I often take for granted, but that make me happy!

Coincidentally, as I was taking my daily walk, thinking about all the pretty things I was seeing and might blog about today, I started listening to a Podcast that was about that very topic! 

The podcast was How to be a Better Human and the Episode was titled: "How to lead a happier, more fulfilling life (with Dr. Robert Waldinger)."

Here's a description of the episode:

Listening to your favorite song, going on vacation, chocolate… What makes YOU happy? Today’s guest, psychiatrist Dr. Robert Waldinger, is the director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, an 83-year-old project--one of the longest-running studies of adult life ever--that tracks how life experience across decades affects health and wellbeing in middle age and beyond. Robert shares the surprising things he’s learned about what makes a meaningful life and what to do--or avoid--in order to have a long, fulfilling existence. Robert is the author of numerous scientific papers as well as two books, and he teaches medical students and psychiatry residents at Massachusetts General Hospital in Boston. He is a Senior Dharma Teacher in Boundless Way Zen. To learn more about "How to Be a Better Human," host Chris Duffy, or find footnotes and additional resources, please visit: go.ted.com/betterhuman

The episode was really interesting, but since I'm a bit of a Happiness Junkie, I already knew about the Harvard Study that they discussed and the results.  Bottom line is the importance of relationships to our happiness.

Yeah, yeah..  relationships are important.. and even in this podcast, they talk about married people "on average" are happier than single people. But there are so many other relationships in our lives.  Sometimes they're just fleeting and sometimes they're life-long. But they can all add to our happiness. 

One thing, in particular that I thought was insightful in this podcast was how Robert answered the question: What makes you a better human? He said it was something he learned from the Dalai Lama: 

"Kindness is my religion"

I think it's so true that if we can go through this life being kind, we will bring happiness to ourselves and to others.  That insightful thought brought me happiness today!

It also made me happy that this topic was so relevant to exactly what I was thinking about without me searching for it! It was like the Podcast Universe read my mind!

Podcasts, in general, are something that I find incredibly wonderful! I just love that this awesome information from such a variety of sources is available to us for free! It's like having an infinite library of entertainment and education and thought-provoking discussions available to us any time!

I was especially grateful for podcasts in the 6-weeks I was recovering from eye surgery and couldn't easily read. My daughter-in-law was so thoughtful in creating a large playlist of a variety of podcasts that she thought I'd like to listen to.

Podcasts have also been especially nice for those nights when I'm having trouble sleeping. There are even podcasts to help you sleep! There are also podcasts to help you learn Spanish! (Another goal of mine.)  There are podcasts about making better podcasts! Basically, there are podcasts about everything and anything!

And as long as I'm raving about podcasts, I'll go ahead and put a plug in for my own podcast, Carpe Diem Connections.  Even though I've taken a break from podcasting, I'm excited about the people I met and all I learned while I was actively podcasting.

How about you? What podcasts do you listen to?

Happiness Happens: Purplicious Ponderings

This month I was reminded that it was Happiness Happens Month which fits in perfectly with my daily gratitude blogging theme! SOHP Founder, Pamela Gail Johnson suggests noticing our favorite color as a mood booster.

Pamela is doing a whole "Count Your Happy" campaign and says:

The most important part is that you have got to let me know your number and favorite color, please! It makes me happy to see you notice your favorite color. 

 

You can email me or post your number on social media with the hashtag: #HappinessHappensMonth

Favorite color is easy: Purple! Number? It's hard to count my plethora of purple possessions! There are SO many pretty purple things I wake up to first thing in the morning. My bedroom is decorated in shades of purple and green! But I will make a numbered list of Purple Gratitude here on this morning's blog post.

1. Purple flowers in photographs that my sister, Michele, texts me regularly. Check out this awesome slideshow she made me for my birthday!
3. 
   
4. 
   
5. This Purpleologist Website shared with me by my thoughtful friend, Michael Bolé. I'm also so grateful to Michael for making my birthday special with plenty of perfectly purple presents!
6. 
7. 
   
8. 
   
9. Amethysts - my birthstone: I have a beautiful one on my dresser that used to be my brother, Chris's. Chris died in a car accident in 1997, so I love that it's also a memory of him.
10. 
    
11. 
    
12. 
13. 
    
14. 
    
15. Photo frames that house pictures from my daughter's wedding - me wearing a beautiful purple gown, and another with me in a purple-Bizarro amusement ride, laughing with my son, Scotty. And then there are the photos of my 3 kids from over 20 years ago. Such sweet memories of their youth!
16. 
    The beautiful cross-stitch of this luxuriating lady was made by my mother, along with the quilt that covers my bed, both in shades of greens and purples.
17. 
18. 
    
19. 
    
20. 
21. 
    
22. The scene from my bathtub, includes a print I bought from an ALS Never Surrender Art Auction.  When I look at it, I not only feel the serenity from the beautiful colors, but I remember my friend and founder of ALS Never Surrender, Steph Courdin.
23. 
    
24. 
25. 
    
26.  And then there are many other fun purple things I'm noticing..  everything from my purple toilet bowl cleaner to my purple face mask! 

I know the numbering is completely off here, but 26 is my favorite number, since I was born on Feb.26 (Yes, it's all about ME, of course!), so I'm going to go with that!

Yay for purple and for all the precious memories and happy thoughts that fill my head as I take notice of this lovely color this morning.

Happiness Happens: Sister Love - Happy National Sister's Day

 

My sister, Michele and me on one of our "Sister's Trips"

I have lots of wonderful pictures of Michele, but I picked this one because when we have our hair the same length, we look so much alike, and people ask if we're twins! That makes me happy, because I've always admired (OK, I'll just say it...  been jealous of..) how pretty my sister is.

In the month of August, I want to blog daily about things I'm grateful for...  things that make me happy, things that I don't want to take for granted. 

The most important thing I don't want to take for granted is the love and acceptance I feel from the people I love most. 

Here's a list of 63 Reasons I love Michele..  I made the list with 62 things last year for her 62 birthday, but since she just had her 63rd birthday, added one more: You listen to me!

63 Things I Love about You, Sis!

1. You leave mints on my pillow when I visit

2. You can find treasures at flea markets 

3. You patiently teach me how to take better pictures

4. You introduce me to your fun friends

5. Tú hablas español conmigo

6. You look out for me

7. You laugh at my jokes

8. You love to celebrate birthdays (including mine!)

9. You find fun, creative, things to add to theme parties

10. You keep yourself pretty and healthy

11. You will talk to me while I’m walking

12. You like learning new things

13. You are empathetic of the troubles and joys of others

14. You like surprises

15. You love your Golden Retrievers

16. You're a caring mother, sister, daughter, wife, friend… and person!

17. You love family

18. You're a great cook

19. You send me pictures of purple flowers

20. You are a talented photographer

21. You are a founding member of The White Bathrobe Club (and include me in meetings!)

22. You are very flexible with your yoga poses!

23. You bring me joy

24. You're a talented gardener

25. You are friendly and a popular neighbor

26. You are playful

27. You find the perfect presents for me

28. You like the smell of lavender

29. You’re relearning the piano!

30. You like massages

31. You're great at interior design and home improvement

32. You can confidently advise me on paint colors

33. You love old books

34. You love new books!

35. You love bookstores!

36. You're smart

37. You like to try new things

38. You're sentimental

39. You can balance an oar on your chin!

40. You influenced my early music tastes: James Taylor, Jim Croce, Van Morrison, Chicago, Crosby, Stills, Nash, & Young

41. You're my confidante

42. You're a wonderful hostess

43. You like celebrating goofy holidays

44. You care for Veterans

45. You're patriotic

46. You likes to play games

47. You built a successful food photography business

48. You're a confident driver

49. You're a scuba diver

50. You participated in my virtual Academy Awards Party

51. You had a Royal tea party 

52. You're stronger than you realizes

53. You're continually improving yourself

54. You're respectful

55. You're insightful

56. You introduced me to Ham/Apple/Brie Panini

57. You surprise me with flowers and little gifts when I visit

58. You make strong drinks that put me in a happy, mellow place

59. You like holiday lights and decorations

60. You are authentic

61. You are creative

62. You listen to me

63. You are older than me!

Overcoming Stage Fright

 

Director, Faye Nepon and I after the Sweet Dreams Performance

Another month comes to an end. This month I've been focusing on my performance with the Musical Theater Group at the Lafayette Center for Musical Arts.

I performed with this group in the summer of 2019 as part of my 60 until 60 project. It may have been my most challenging goal because I suffer from serious stage fright.

However, I remembered how excited I was to perform 2 years ago, so I signed up again this summer, thinking it would be easy, now that I was "experienced."

It turned out that the first few weeks of rehearsals were not at all easy! I was filled with anxiety..  shaking and sick to my stomach at every rehearsal. I was very tempted to quit. Why was I putting myself through this? Singing on stage is not a necessary life skill!

But I really wanted to see if I could accomplish two big things:

1. Improve my singing
2. Calm my anxiety and overcome my stage fright

I fully believe in the "growth mindset" and that we can improve any skill if we focus on it.. even skills we think we're lacking in natural talent.

I also have been very interested in the psychology behind anxiety.  I needed to put myself in a situation that typically causes very high anxiety to see if I'd be able to learn how to control it.  Singing on stage is probably the scariest thing I could do that imposes no physical danger.

I kept asking myself why I got so nervous! What was behind this uncontrollable shaking..  this upset stomach.. these feelings like I was on the verge of tears?

• Part of the trigger may have been childhood embarrassing "failures" when I couldn't get through a piano recital.  As a child, my stage fright was so unbearable that I quit piano, even though I liked playing.  Just not for an audience!
• I also think I've always been a bit of a perfectionist and never wanted to perform, knowing I'm much more likely to make mistakes when people are listening. Even though, intellectually, I know the audience would not be "judging" me negatively, I'm my own worst critic.  I've never had formal singing training and feel embarrassed at my relative lack of talent.  If you sing on stage, it's as though you're saying, "Hey Everyone! Come be entertained by me!"..  and then think they're thinking, "Does she know she's not good?" So, yeah...  embarrassing..
• And then the final problem is being afraid of the anxiety itself! The more I do NOT want to tremble, the more anxiety I'm feeling and the more I tremble!

In the first 3 or 4 weeks of practice, I felt like my anxiety was getting worse rather than better.  But then there was a turning point a few weeks ago.  Rehearsals got easier and I didn't even get nervous!

And tonight, I did it!  I wasn't perfect, but I was happy. My singing and acting had improved and I was hardly nervous at all!

What was the key? Here are some of the reasons why I think I was able to overcome my stage fright for the performance tonight:

• I took a private singing lesson with Faye. We changed the key and I felt more comfortable with the lower key. I gained confidence in my singing abilities.
• I practiced my song until I could sing it without even thinking..  it was committed to muscle memory. This also improved my confidence.
• During the early rehearsals, I'd also been worried about my eyes..  I was having unexpected difficulties post-surgery, so I think the anxiety from that was contributing to my nerves about singing.
• The monologue I wrote was about my friend, Craig, with ALS and his courage. I realized that singing on stage is such a silly thing to be "afraid" of.  I was reminded how much I take my voice for granted.
• I practiced mindfulness and deep breathing and was in a safe space, surrounded by supportive people.
• I knew audience expectations were low because we were an amateur group and there was no cost for the show.
• One of the more experienced singers in the group said something like, "The audience enjoys the people who are having fun, even if they aren't talented."  So I made up my mind to just have fun! To smile and enjoy the experience! And that's just what I did!

Here's a link to my rehearsal. Hopefully, soon, I'll have a link to the actual performance!

Sundays with Craig

I've been an advocate for ALS Awareness since losing my inspirational friend, Craig Dunham, to ALS in 2010. This year, rather than leading a local walk, I'm going to be volunteering and fundraising for the Napa Valley Ride to End ALS.

I'm also going to be doing a monologue about Craig and singing on stage on July 31! Craig's example of fearlessness inspires me daily.  

People with ALS live with so many huge challenges. I know Craig's inability to talk in his last 6 months of his life was so frustrating for him.  But, he was always finding ways to communicate.  That's what he did. He always found a way.

I'm SO lucky to be able to speak and to sing. I've always wanted to perform in a musical, but stage-fright and lack of confidence kept me from it.  Singing on stage is such a silly thing to be afraid of and in no way compares to the challenges that those with ALS face constantly.

But Craig's courage reminds me that if he can do SO much in spite of such huge challenges, then I can face my unfounded fears and sing,  I always imagine Craig reminding me not to waste any time fearing failure or embarrassment.   I know his spirit will be with me giving me confidence and cheering me on.